Learn Italian
Learn from the courses my dad's booked for me
Learn Salsa
Apply for veterinary science and scholarship
Get ready for a holiday to australia
Study some psychology
Learn how to play hey there delilah on the guitar
Finish watching FRIENDS
Maybe some gossip girl(i know, i know)
Run or swim everyday
Start playing basketball again
Start windsurfing with my brother again
Teach some tution
Do some odd jobs for fun
Get a new handphone
Get a laptop
webcam
Talk to my friends
Get Lasik

I didn't get into law school.
I'm not a lawyer.
I'm never going to be a lawyer.
Or a judge.
I don't judge.

there is no condemnation.
Only love and acceptance.

You are you.
And who you want to be.

Paul Gauguin once said: 'Where do we come from? What are we? Where are we going?'

A picture's worth a thousand words,
and in a thousand splendid suns, a thousand worlds,
who pause about their daily grind,
to grind down to an instant's bind,
and as the photo seeks to form,
to its image it conforms,
it has thus no future and no past,
for the moment has to last,
and slowly as the colors flew,
sprouts a perfect picture grew,
and what this perfect picture glues,
is a perfect picture of me and you.

Yay to me again! Now who's going to buy me a car?

I kind of just scraped by though, blessings to the guy who invented free counts!

God, I'm still out of work. But it doesn't matter if I study during this time right?

One last thing. My knee really really hurts. Especially when I squat down and stand up, I will stumble on the first step my left leg takes. It seems to have gotten worse after basketball yesterday. Now it just hurts when I put pressure on it. Oh no, is it going to break!?

Yay to me.

I have received news that soldiers or ex-soldiers will be prosecuted if they reveal too much about the army's military might to 'terrorist lurking in cyberspace'. I don't even know if I will get into trouble by talking about this. Way to go freedom.

Well, I have got a whole new spanking idea! Instead of trying to clamp down on info leaks or whatever, why not go the other way and saturate the net with so much information that no one can tell for sure what's real and what's not. This will allow everyone their freedom of speech, albeit burying it among mounds of bull.

Come on, make up your own bull. Tell them about the space shuttle we have that shoots death rays from its nose. Not only that, it has cool neon lights on its undercarriage. Always a popular one with the chicks. All that power and good looks and it runs on like, two lemons and a guava.

If you can't confuse them with cleverness, baffle them with bull.

Whew, its been a busy and rather stressful past couple of days. I have been busy with preparations and getting conned out of my hard earned money. Well, at least I have learnt that people can be such bitches when it comes to cash and that sometimes when they do, you just have to be alert and know what you want. I'm not too sure yet if this shows that I'm not cut out for the business world, or is a valuable lesson that will give me an edge when dealing with business matters. I've always thought that what the world was like depended on the frame you looked at it, but now I'm not so sure.

The problem with having the freedom to think whatever you want is that on the chance that that's not true, you have unlimited potential to screw up big time. You know, some people paint too happy a picture at times. You know, when you face a setback its always "oh, everyone makes mistakes, you'll learn from it and improve." and they bombard you with stories of people who have tried and made it and how "with more practice, you'll improve". Its never just "you suck at this, and seriously shouldn't be doing this at all". That may be true, but its never the right thing to say. You will never want to be the one to step on other's dreams would you?

Well, I should be indignant and angry and I guess I am. But I also marked the papers and wrote a page of study tips, and am going to pop it into their postbox. At least I'm not sinking down to their level.

Or is that something those who lose out say to comfort themselves?

What is in a blog? A recollection of day to day events? Or a canvas onto which your hopes and dreams are painted? A forum for you to bitch about the world? Or a journey of self discovery through words? Well, for me at least, it is all.

I've pretty much had this blog since I was in secondary 2, and it has been like my little public journal. Keeping track of my ups and downs for those entertained by my writing style. Sometimes I write it for others, sometimes for myself. But for all the writing of each individual post, I sometimes find it most exciting to look through everything.

It is only then, that you realise how your attitude has changed over the years. How your thoughts have matured, feelings have developed and personality has been refined. I think it puts everything in perspective and lets you know where you are going.

You could think of it as you being a point on a canvas. As you move through the the canvas, which represents your life unfolding, you retain the dimensions of a point, which is only one dimensional. So at any one time, this point is your whole life to you. Sure you have little furrows in the paperwork where you used to be, but its faint and sketchy. You don't really know which direction you have been going. You don't really know where you have been or if you are moving straight or in circles.

That's because you are a point, a singularity. You have no length, no breadth, and certainly no depth. That singularity represents who you are now. You might just go anywhere, you might have any sort of fortune and you'd know nothing about yourself.

Now imagine that while you are at this point in your life. Instead of being just a dot moving around, you left a teeny little pencil mark. Just a spot rubbed off from yourself to mark the canvas and to show to yourself that you have been here before. Just a little mark before you move on with your life in time.

In the next moment, another mark. Maybe in a different style or stroke, but a mark all the same. Just a little mark before you move on with your life in time.

One more moment, one more mark. On and on it goes.

One fine day, when you are feeling particularly reflective. You command your little dot to float up higher. And as you gain perspective you look at the dots you have left behind and realise that you have just painted the picture of your life. And all those dots are just parts of the grand picture. Your grand picture.

Why do you blog?