4 More hours! Exciting shit... No time to write anything, but I sure am glad about the last four months. Starting with the end of 'A's till today. Don't know about later though(: I'm so going to miss shampooing... (Insert joke) Forget shampoo, demand real poo! Heh heh heh.

Step one: Summon Demon
Step two: Lose control of Demon
Step three: Get torn up by Demon
Step four: Nurse wounds
Step five: Slay Demon
Step six: Check to make sure Demon is dead
Step seven: Wait for a while then bury Demon under Golden Tablet

Yay.

Since alven ask, Lik khian answer. What is the difference between infatuation and love?

First up, definitions. My trusty www.dictionary.com defines infatuation as
1. A foolish, unreasoning, or extravagant passion or attraction. See Synonyms at love.
2. An object of extravagant, short-lived passion.

While Love is
1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
3. sexual passion or desire.
4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.
5. (used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection, or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love?
6. a love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour.
7. sexual intercourse; copulation.
8. (initial capital letter) a personification of sexual affection, as Eros or Cupid.
9. affectionate concern for the well-being of others: the love of one's neighbor.
10. strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking for anything: her love of books.
11. the object or thing so liked: The theater was her great love.
12. the benevolent affection of God for His creatures, or the reverent affection due from them to God.
13. Chiefly Tennis. a score of zero; nothing.
14. a word formerly used in communications to represent the letter L. –verb (used with object)
15. to have love or affection for: All her pupils love her.
16. to have a profoundly tender, passionate affection for (another person).
17. to have a strong liking for; take great pleasure in: to love music.
18. to need or require; benefit greatly from: Plants love sunlight.
19. to embrace and kiss (someone), as a lover.
20. to have sexual intercourse with.
Freaking long.

Well, all these definitions are good and proper when discussing literal meanings of infatuation and love. In this contex, the difference is quite obvious. Infatuation is simply stupid love. But of course we don't discuss such trifling issues here. We discuss big important issues that are impossible to pen down. Yet, this is exactly what I am going to do. People are willing to fight and die for love. But as they say, the pen is mightier than the sword (or in today's terms, the ergonomic keyboard is mightier than the particle-beam weapon). Thus shall I begin.

First up, lets change the question by putting it in context. I shall reframe it by stating, when I feel deeply attracted to someone, how do I tell if I love her, or if I am merely infatuated with her? And just so my argument is made simpler, I shall constrict love to mean only the hunka hunka mama mama type of love. Not the 'I LOVE MY MAZDA' kind.

Well my friends, there are several sides to this. First is the one that says that love and infatuation are one and the same. It is only used differently after the beginning of the relationship is over for in love, there is a beginning, middle and end, while in infatuation there is only a beginning and end. Therefore the difference lies in the middle. After all, when one feels the first pangs of adoration and attraction, it is easy to get confused over whether it is love or infatuation. And the answer is that it is one and the same. It is too early to tell. Both begins with and overwhelming desire for the object of your attraction. Popular thought is that in love, the feeling grows and develops for a certain length of time, which may or may not end up with you being attatched to that person, while in infatuation, the feeling dies off, leaving you wondering what exactly it was that you liked about that person. In this case, it would be impossible to know beforehand if what you experience was indeed love, or just a crush.

Infatuation can also be taught to be love at first sight. Because infatuation is defined as a foolish or unreasonable passion for someone, love can then be when you have found the reason to feel passion for someone. And because you now have a reason to motivate you to love someone, the relationship is hence more likely to last longer.

Ok, thats all for today. I'm fresh out of reitsu.

I've always wondered why i tend to like the essays that I get low marks for and find those that I get better marks for boring. Thanks to richard, who asked my why my paragraphs seem to have no link, I believe I have solved the mystery!

Which brings me to this theory of two styles of writing. I shall call them series and parallel. In series writing, I have a starting point and an arbitary ending point, or not. What happens is that you start writing on a certain topic, and as you go along, you generate ideas for your next paragraph, which generate ideas for your next paragraph, which generate ideas for your next paragraph, ad infinitum or when you are tired of typing. Usually this makes it seem like each paragraph is not relevant to the topic, or even to the next, but it is! It really is. There's a thin sliver of logic linking each paragraph together. And the best part is that no one knows where this might lead up to. Usually you end up somewhere totally unexpected and it is as though the whole thing writes itself and you are just typing shit in. I usually fail this kind of essays.

The next kind will be the parallel writing. This is where at the end of every paragraph, you will have to link it to the topic in question.

This is boring shit, commonly found in good gp essays and social studies answers. I think that in this format, each paragraph does not link to the next but instead goes back to the question, much like, erm... Aha! A flower, where each petal is not connected to the next but are all connected to the pedicel or whatever to form the corolla. As opposed to the 'series' type writing, which is like, erm... BEADS ON A STRING, wrapped around a histone protein which is actually your main argument I guess. So each paragraph is linked not so much with the topic statement, but with the ideas before and after it. Voila, a bio lesson. Just because sm wrote about her teaching bio. And to think that I wanted to write about the difference between infatuation and love originally.

Theres a mysterious red stain on my retractable keyboard platform. I'm thinking its either blood leaking from my arm because of an over-enthusiastic mosquito or because of the blood-red dragonfruit that my dad gave me just now. Ok, I see no gaping wounds so its probably the fruit. But it does smell a little coppery.

Speaking of coppery, I just have to ask this question. Why does blood taste metallic? Is it because it contains Ferrum? I'm just saying Ferrum instead of Iron to sound cool. But anyhow, theres only ONE per polypeptide meaning four per molecule. Which isn't that much I might think.

Coincidentally, my friend just asked me a chemistry question! About organic chemistry of all things! Which suddenly made me realise that I kind of miss knowing all that chemistry syllabus. Now I probably can't even balance an equation. Come to think of it, I kind of miss physics too. Bio not that much though, I never did memorize much of it. Shit! I actually feel the long forgotten urge to look at the chem summary that Chok made for us and reprise the reaction steps.

Allright! Enough of that. Stupid education system, making us learn things that we will never need to know and that we will not remember totally, but forever remain a floating wisp on the outer reaches of our memories. Never called to use but forever hovering at the edge of our consciousness. Capable and Committed leadership. Effective systems of checks on power. Strong navy. Mmmmm, thats...... Venice isn't it?

Ok, enough. See, I've even forgotten what I initially wanted to talk about today. I guess this is one of the first posts in awhile that I actually talked about something huh. Those photologs and tiny paragraphs seem kind of like fillers, just like the Bounto. Well, guess there isn't much to come up with when something like Bleach is using up so much of my consciousness. Well now. How about that.

Do you ever feel that your brain works kind of like a horribly inefficient computer? I mean, for me, I always have a running commentary going on in my head, which I use to think about things. I call that my RAM. And its even more RAM than RAM.

To me, RAM stands for Random Access Memory, and thats what it does. It randomly pulls up bits and pieces of information stored in my head and then plays it in my mind. I guess that's how I, and people in general (hopefully) come up with 'random' thoughts.

Also, just like RAM, it has a limited space. Say you are running warcraft, msn, wme, ie and then just for kicks microsoft word, exel, powerpoint and frontpage. Your computer, whether you like it or not, is going to lag so badly, your question mark wouldn't disappear forever. Even when these programmes are running n the background, you can probably only see one at the time on your monitor. The rest are regulated to a little rectangle at the bottom of the screen. With a little logo beside it and some white words telling you what it is. I am so going off topic because my analogy is falling apart. Anyway, the point I had hoped to make was that when I spend so much time thinking about Bleach I have liitle time to think of other stuff, and that I am unable to think of two separate things at the same time. the best I can do is to switch back and forth between the two thoughts and keep picking up where I left off.

Just to make another dumb analogy, the running commentary in my head is sort like that little paperclup guy. Always there, always giving his goddamned opinions and always in the way. Really. I just had that happen. I was just thinking that I should start thinking about how I was thinking that I was just thinking about an example of the little guy talking to me, and it just wrote itself. But hey, I'm grateful for that little guy. It does get mighty lonely way the hell up here in the brains department. Little bloodflow too. Seems like its all being diverted somewhere else. (wink wink). Plus he's a clever little bugger. Always jumping to the conclusion ahead of me in some weird intuitive leap leaving me behind to try to connecto the two points together. Great for thinking up lame stuff. Not so great for getting L5 on your social studies paper. Which was 3 years ago. Hmm. That's it, I am so done with the prose. On to the corny poetry instead!

in the Eye of the Storm

All this march madness,
caught in the eye of the storm.
Behind inky blackness,
in front to follow the norm.

Within an oasis of respite,
reluctant to blunder on.
Its the blind leading the blind,
trying to push through the storm.

How nice just to sit and wait,
just to sing a song.
Nothing to worry about,
except shee ba la tong.

But try lifting your head,
and look beyond the porn.
You're still being surrounded,
you'll never exit the storm.

Nothing stays forever,
even in the eye of the storm.
Pressure to push on forward,
to find out where you belong.

OK that's it. My brain has shriveled up and died. Till next time folks!